Based in Kirkland, Virginia Leen Law & Mediation Office, P.S. is conveniently located to serve clients in the greater Seattle area and King County in Washington State. Our practice is focused on helping families amicably resolve family law matters, including divorce, property division, support, and child custody. Please learn more about our firm’s philosophy below.
There is a way to get through a divorce with your dignity and bank account intact, and most importantly, your children in the best emotional state possible. It requires a shift in attitude from making it a fight to a more common-sense approach of resolving the issues. If divorce is done properly, there are no winners or losers.
This does not mean that you compromise or deny your own needs and well-being to avoid conflict. It means that you are more motivated to put your life back together in a positive way than you are to take revenge and inflict pain on your partner. It means that you treat the division of assets and debts as a business matter. If you have children, it means that their needs come first. And it means you accept that they need two parents in their lives, regardless of how you personally feel about your soon-to-be ex-partner.
A primary benefit of this approach is sparing your family from the emotional fallout caused by tactics traditionally used in divorce litigation. People who attack each other during the process may never recover civility. Their children may read every nasty detail on public record years later.
A secondary benefit is how much time and money you can save by using a rational, problem-solving approach. For example, in most cases the process of dividing assets and debts takes a fairly predictable path, regardless of what the attorneys say, the degree of aggression, or the volume of paperwork and court time. Generally, the spouse or partner with lower earnings is likely to get a higher percentage of the assets and a lower percentage of the debts.
The issues that accompany divorce, such as property division and child custody, are rarely simple. In reality people can and do become very enmeshed in fighting over subtleties, for example, a few percentage points of the asset/debt division or an extra night a month with the children.
If you knew at the beginning of the litigation process that you could spend up to a third of your assets on attorneys’ fees with a slim chance of success, would you still do it? Or would you look for an alternative? Would you try to find a better way if you knew the animosity created in your divorce would result in emotional trauma for your children and that you and your ex-partner would be unable to effectively communicate about parenting concerns? Or that you would return to court frequently to battle about petty issues?
Through low-conflict and alternative dispute resolution methods, such as mediation and collaborative law, you and your partner can work together to optimize your lives after the dissolution of your marriage. You can divide your assets and debts in a manner that you think is fair. You can develop a parenting plan and visitation schedule that works for your family. You can build a working relationship that allows you to effectively co-parent your children until they are adults, and beyond. Most importantly, whatever solutions you create, you control the process and own the outcome.
If you are facing divorce and wish to learn more about methods of alternative dispute resolution, please contact Virginia Leen Law & Mediation Office, P.S.. We can help you resolve your issues and settle your divorce peacefully, rationally, and effectively.